Wedding Tips

Awesome Marriage Tips That Every Man Must Know About! A Must Read For Husbands!

By  | 2 years ago

Listening to marriage tips and advice coming from a divorced man is pretty much unusual.

Why would you listen to his tips knowing he failed miserably to save his own marriage, right?


These tips are the kind of things that the divorced man failed to do.

These tips are the kind of things that he wished he had done to save his own marriage.

So if you are going into a rough married life, check out these tips and maybe it’s not too late for you to save that relationship.

Marriage Advice

MARRIAGE ADVICE I WISH I WOULD HAVE HAD by Gerald Rogers

Obviously, I’m not a relationship expert.

But there’s something about my divorce being finalized this week that gives me perspective of things I wish I would have done different… After losing a woman that I loved, and a marriage of almost 16 years, here’s the advice I wish I would have had…

1). Never stop courting. Never stop dating.

NEVER EVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would OWN HER HEART and to fiercely protect it.

This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE CHOSE YOU. Never forget that, and NEVER GET LAZY in your love.

2). PROTECT YOUR OWN HEART. Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance.

Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife.

Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.

3). FALL IN LOVE OVER and OVER and OVER again. You will constantly change. You’re not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday.

SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU, and if you don’t take care of her heart, she may give that heart to someone else or seal you out completely, and you may never be able to get it back.

Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her.

4). ALWAYS SEE THE BEST in her. Focus only on what you love.

What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged.

If you focus on what you love, you can’t help but be consumed by love.

Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to be have this woman as your wife.

5). IT’S NOT YOUR JOB TO CHANGE OR FIX HER… your job is to love her as she is with no expectation of her ever changing.

And if she changes, love what she becomes, whether it’s what you wanted or not.

6). TAKE FULL ACCOUNTABILITY for your own emotions. It’s not your wife’s job to make you happy, and she CAN’T make you sad.

You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love.

7). NEVER BLAME your wife If YOU get frustrated or angry at her, it is only because it is triggering something inside of YOU.

They are YOUR emotions, and your responsibility.

When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of YOU that is asking to be healed.

You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them… when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were.

8). Allow your woman to JUST BE. When she’s sad or upset, it’s not your job to fix it, it’s your job to HOLD HER and let her know it’s ok.

Let her know that you hear her, and that she’s important and that you are that pillar on which she can always lean.

The feminine spirit is about change and emotion and like a storm her emotions will roll in and out, and as you remain strong and unjudging she will trust you and open her soul to you… DON’T RUN-AWAY WHEN SHE’S UPSET.

Stand present and strong and let her know you aren’t going anywhere. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion.

9). BE SILLY. don’t take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier.

10). FILL HER SOUL EVERYDAY. learn her love languages and the specific ways that she feels important and validated and CHERISHED.

Ask her to create a list of 10 THINGS that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a queen.

11). BE PRESENT. Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul.

Do whatever it takes to clear your head so that when you are with her you are fully WITH HER. Treat her as you would your most valuable client. She is.

12). BE WILLING TO TAKE HER SEXUALLY. to carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul.

Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully.

13). DON’T BE AN IDIOT. And don’t be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes and so will she.

Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make.

You’re not supposed to be perfect, just try to not be too stupid.

14). GIVE HER SPACE.  The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself.

Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing…. (okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point.

Tell her to take time for herself, ESPECIALLY after you have kids.

She needs that space to renew and get re-centered, and to find herself after she gets lost in serving you, the kids and the world.)

15). BE VULNERABLE. you don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes.

16). BE FULLY TRANSPARENT. If you want to have trust you must be willing to share EVERYTHING… Especially those things you don’t want to share.

It takes courage to fully love, to fully open your heart and let her in when you don’t know i she will like what she finds… Part of that courage is allowing her to love you completely, your darkness as well as your light.

DROP THE MASK… If you feel like you need to wear a mask around her, and show up perfect all the time, you will never experience the full dimension of what love can be.

17). NEVER STOP GROWING TOGETHER. The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool.

Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is if you stop working on your relationship.

Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards.

18). DON’T WORRY ABOUT MONEY. Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It never helps when teammates fight.

Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win.

19). FORGIVE IMMEDIATELY and focus on the future rather than carrying weight from the past. Don’t let your history hold you hostage.

Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back.

FORGIVENESS IS FREEDOM. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love.

20). ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. In the end, this is the only advice you need.

If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure.

In the end MARRIAGE isn’t about Happily ever after. It’s about work.

And a commitment to grow together and a willingness to continually invest in creating something that can endure eternity. Through that work, the happiness will come.

Marriage is life, and it will bring ups and downs.

Embracing all of the cycles and learning to learn from and love each experience will bring the strength and perspective to keep building, one brick at a time.

If you are reading this and find wisdom in my pain, share it those those young husbands whose hearts are still full of hope, and with those couples you may know who may have forgotten how to love.

One of those men may be like I was, and in these hard earned lessons perhaps something will awaken in him and he will learn to be the man his lady has been waiting for.

If you are reading this and your marriage isn’t what you want it to be, take 100% responsibility for YOUR PART in marriage, regardless of where your spouse is at, and commit to applying these lessons while there is time.

MEN- THIS IS YOUR CHARGE : Commit to being an EPIC LOVER.

There is no greater challenge, and no greater prize.

Your woman deserves that from you.  Be the type of husband your wife can’t help but brag about.

Awesome tips but for sure, a lot of men will find it hard to follow them up. Good luck!

Advice is written by Gerald Rogers – Transformational Leader at LIVE BIG.





44 Comments

  1. Margarita Ibbott

    January 26, 2015 at 3:05 pm

    EPIC blog post! So man things are so very true. I’ve been married for over 21 years and I have to say my husband does many of these things already. Good advice for both partners that is for sure.

  2. Tom

    January 26, 2015 at 3:10 pm

    When I read the title I though I wasn’t gonna like this article but I found it a refreshing read. Well done!

  3. Lauren

    January 27, 2015 at 8:15 am

    This looks like a good read for all of the husbands out there, including the men who are looking to become husbands in the future. I think many of these tips will benefit the couples out there that need reassurance.

  4. Lies

    January 27, 2015 at 11:16 am

    This is a great post. And refreshing to see the points being made by a man. I’m not married but it can definitely apply to a long term relationship.

  5. Tiffany Yong W.T. (tiffanyyongwt)

    January 27, 2015 at 5:08 pm

    This is a list of great advice, but I believe it takes two hands to clap. The wife have to put in equal effort for the relationship to work! But I like the tips especially 1 and 16!

  6. Sunshine Kelly

    January 27, 2015 at 6:11 pm

    Agree! I like this post and all men should read this again and again so that they will treat their wife better.

  7. Sin Yee

    January 28, 2015 at 1:49 am

    Duvorced or not does not matter for me. As long as you shared really great tips. I am yet to get married, but this is still useful.

  8. phyliciamarie

    January 28, 2015 at 8:28 am

    I think the most important part id about accountability. Owning up shows humility and compassion and will go a long way in a relationship

  9. Franc Ramon

    January 28, 2015 at 8:34 am

    I guess a relationship is a continuous process of knowing each other and working as a team. It’s also important that you continue to date and fall in love with each other regularly.

  10. Fred

    January 28, 2015 at 11:53 am

    I have to admit not all of these are easy to do. They sound good in words, but to put them in practice is not always so easy. Just to your best always to make your wife happy.

  11. Ace Paragoyo

    January 28, 2015 at 1:28 pm

    I believe in give and take relationship but thanks for sharing this some pointers. Sometimes in each relationship either married or in a relationship you both encountered and experienced issues.

  12. eliz frank

    January 28, 2015 at 1:47 pm

    What a beautiful post and very sound advice for all couples. It’s a pity that many relationships fail because of money issues or because of many of the other points you raised.

  13. Katrina Centeno

    January 28, 2015 at 1:47 pm

    Hope those who need the advice most would heed. Funny how someone would mean the world to you and then mean less once divorce procee.dings start

  14. Fernando Lachica

    January 29, 2015 at 12:34 pm

    I could share these tips for younger generation. I’m happy with my married life even though I’ve done only half of these tips.

  15. Mommy Maye

    January 30, 2015 at 5:24 am

    Those are great tips. Sometimes we became comfortable with each other that we are forget the needs of each other.

  16. Skinny B

    January 30, 2015 at 10:11 am

    This is so true. THank you for coming up with this! this is very helpful

  17. Marichu B.

    January 30, 2015 at 1:12 pm

    i so love this post. will share this to my husband!

    http://chubs10182014.blogspot.com/

  18. papaleng

    February 1, 2015 at 3:25 am

    I’ll remember these tips if I’m gonna settle down na. Just kidding, but Indeed great tips for husband to make one marriage last forever daw. For me, Faith and Trust lang and always be funny.

  19. lovemindanao

    February 1, 2015 at 3:36 am

    i guess #16 is the usual mistake husbands door hard to do… just keep the fire burning and let each other a little interesting every day

  20. Jojo Vito

    February 1, 2015 at 3:54 am

    Great post! I agree, its not our job to change our wife. Our role is to love —this holds true to both parties.:)

  21. Gil Camporazo

    February 1, 2015 at 5:05 am

    What a perfect council on marriage to the couples. If all these things are followed and put them to practice, I don’t think real-time marriage won’t be effective and successful, and last forever.

  22. Pal Raine

    February 1, 2015 at 5:28 am

    Do I have to read this? Hahahaha, oh well hope my ex-husband read this post of yours.

    Anyway, for my Romeo(just dreaming!)…kindly read this:
    MEN- THIS IS YOUR CHARGE : Commit to being an EPIC LOVER.

  23. Karen

    February 1, 2015 at 7:32 am

    I shared this with my husband and he gave me a big smile.

  24. Lai Gamboa

    February 1, 2015 at 8:14 am

    Oh thanks so much for this post, it reminded me and my husband a lot of important things in our marriage life. One of the best advice we can give is to stay committed at each other not because were married, but because we love each other.

  25. Allan

    February 2, 2015 at 12:06 am

    These are great tips for men especially husbands like me. Thanks for sharing this.

  26. MC Dee

    February 2, 2015 at 2:03 am

    Thank you for these amazing advice. I let my boyfriend read it. 😛

  27. Pamela G

    February 2, 2015 at 3:44 am

    Great tips! I agree with all of them 100%

  28. Blessing

    February 2, 2015 at 9:17 am

    Quite an educative and interesting article and to think that you pointed out all these facts are just amazing.
    Thanks for sharing.

  29. kareen liez

    February 3, 2015 at 5:44 am

    Great tips you have here! Would definitely share this to my husband!

  30. Franc Ramon

    February 3, 2015 at 11:18 am

    I thinks it’s nice to find common grounds as during the longer part, it’s the friendship that carries the relationship.

  31. Melgie

    February 3, 2015 at 2:07 pm

    Such a great post! 16 years in marriage is really long time and thank you for this wonderful tips. It will help to those who need some piece of advice.. Awesome reading the whole thing. Thank you for sharing
    http://www.sweetcuisinera.com

  32. Alissa

    February 12, 2015 at 11:20 pm

    These are some great advice. All men should take note on this. Marriage requires work and these tips surely does work.

  33. Robin Rue (@massholemommy)

    June 15, 2015 at 10:18 am

    I am definitely showing this to my husband. He totally doesn’t get how I think and maybe this would help a little?

  34. Kiersten

    June 15, 2015 at 2:43 pm

    This is something men should read before getting married, and maybe should be included in the ‘handbook.’ I’m lucky to say my husband already does these things!

  35. Amanda

    June 15, 2015 at 8:40 pm

    This is such a wonderful blog post and reminder. With two little boys, my husband is totally on the back burner in terms of my love and affection. Time to give him some love, too!

  36. Chelley @ AisForAdelaide

    June 15, 2015 at 9:22 pm

    Great advice! Your title totally had me worried, but I think these are great reminders for both parties to remember that marriage is work… some of the best kind, of course, but still work.

  37. Cindy (Vegetarian Mamma)

    June 16, 2015 at 12:07 am

    This is such a great blog post! I love the fall in lover over and over and over with her again. That is so true!

  38. Franc Ramon

    June 16, 2015 at 7:48 am

    It’s really important to preserve the romance part of it. It keeps the relationship stronger and interesting.

  39. becka

    June 16, 2015 at 1:10 pm

    Great post. I agree on many of the points. I agree you have to be transparent and honest.

  40. Elizabeth O.

    June 16, 2015 at 2:44 pm

    These are great tips. My husband and I have been married for 25 years. Falling in love again and again and staying committed to each other are what made it work.

  41. Donna Ward

    June 16, 2015 at 2:45 pm

    My gosh – you’ve hit it right on target – congratulations on such wonderful insights that you’ve discovered – now if we can each follow these ideas, what a perfect marriage we would have – Big smiles 🙂

  42. April G

    June 16, 2015 at 6:49 pm

    I love that it comes from someone who loved and lost than someone who never loved enough to marry. I loved this post and am going to share it with my husband. Do you think it’s good for Father’s Day?

  43. Kendra

    June 17, 2015 at 6:44 pm

    Great tips! Before we got married, I always told my husband he must always date me.

  44. Tiffany

    June 18, 2015 at 4:27 am

    Amazing advice for any man and even for us women. I find that worries can put a hault to a marriage especially when it comes to money but finding joy in the person who chose instead of focusing on those things can make it all so much easier.